The
Programme of Joining Hands
for
Free Caodai Publications
________
HUỆ KHẢI
(Dũ Lan LÊ ANH DŨNG)
THE VIRTUOUS
FAMILY
AS VIEWED BY CAODAISM
(A Preliminary
Sketch of an Aspect of Family Education)
HỒNG
ĐỨC Publishing House
Hà Nội 2021
*
From
Heart to Heart
On Saturday
morning, 09 January 2021, the Pastoral Institute of the HCMC Archdiocese
launched a course named Discovering
Catholicism and Caodaism. Included in the course was the lecture entitled The Virtuous Family as Viewed by Caodaism, presented
by Huệ Khải on Saturday morning, 08 May 2021. This bilingual booklet might be
regarded as the fruit of the mentioned lecture.
*
On 27 December
2020, Pope Francis announced the year of Amoris Laetitia Family,([1]) which prolongs fifteen months, from 19 March 2021 until 26
June 2022.
Thus, the fact
that family is one issue included in the course might be not a coincidence but
a thoughtful arrangement made by the Pastoral Institute authorities.
It is possible
to say that the virtuous family is a comprehensive issue. Hence, within the
time given, I shall provide a preliminary sketch of some main ideas
relevant to family education which
is the fundamental and foremost element to build up a family of virtue
successfully.
The reason is
that a virtuous family results from family education which helps
Caodai followers perceive their mission either
when they intend to get married or when they have got married.
Actually,
according to a holy message bestowed by Spirit Trần Hưng Đạo, “establishing a family” means
imperceptibly receiving a “mission”.([2])
What is
the meaning of family?
Encyclopaedia
Britannica defines family
as follows:
“Family,
a group of persons united by the ties of marriage,
blood, or adoption, constituting a single household and interacting with each
other in their respective social positions, usually those of spouses, parents,
children, and siblings.” ([3])
According to the above-quoted definition,
family begins from marriage; in
other words, marriage is the beginning of
family. This concept has likewise been accepted by Vietnamese people since
old ages. Actually, instead of saying, “He married her,” one says, “He built a family with her.” The question
“When did you get married?” can be replaced by “When did you establish your family?”
What
does a virtuous family result from?
Fundamentally, a virtuous family results
from a virtuous marriage. What is
the meaning of a virtuous marriage? First of all, Caodai followers are taught
that the conjugal relationship between a man and a woman does not consist in
meeting the need to have sex.
Spirit Trần
Hưng Đạo’s holy message asserts:
“A
conjugal union is not to meet the need of having sex; in fact, it is a sacred
and everlasting love.” ([4])
A common concept expresses that
maintaining the human race is the purpose of marriage.
Handed down from the First Universalism,([5]) Genesis (1:27-28) narrates:
So
God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male
and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and
increase in number; fill the earth . . .” ([6])
In the Third Universalism,([7]) Spirit Trần Hưng Đạo’s holy
message affirms that maintaining the human race is each married couple’s
“mission”. Moreover, when closely connected to a “mission”, the maintained race
shall be “a future generation” good
and worthy.
Spirit Trần Hưng Đạo’s holy message says:
“Everyone
is interested in setting up a married couple’s life, and then having offspring.
As husband and wife, the couple's union is designed to fulfil the mission to build up their family and
forge a future generation. Their descendants are imparted a bright and cheerful
spirit, a warm and enthusiastic bloodstream,
a model traditionally handed down through ages.” ([8])
Perceiving that having offspring is also
the mission to “forge a future generation”, one comprehends why Psalm
has this verse:
“Children
are a heritage from the Lord; offspring is a reward from Him.” (127:3)
If Psalm
127:3 is fully grasped, parents are not to ruin such heritage or reward.
Hence, Catholicism, Caodaism, and other true religions naturally do not agree
with any legalisation of the abortion crime.
Nevertheless, in order to fulfil the
mission to “forge a future generation” as
Spirit Trần Hưng Đạo’s holy message says, parents shall educate or instruct
their children right in the family, and shall not entirely entrust their offspring to society.
The
virtuous family is the fruit of an education journey starting right in the family
So as not to be uprooted from their own
families, the children of religious parents should be provided more
opportunities to enjoy the education based on the virtuous tradition of their
family as well as the guidance or direction given by those having responsibility
in the religion followed by their parents.
In the First Universalism, the Old
Testament reminds parents of their responsibility for educating their children
as follows:
“(A)
child left undisciplined disgraces its mother.” (Proverbs
29:15)
“Discipline
your children, and they will give you peace; they will bring you the delights
you desire.” (Proverbs 29:17)
Today, Familiaris consortio,([9]) a post-synodal apostolic
exhortation ([10]) on family promulgated by
Pope John Paul II on 22 November 1981, Part II, 14, asserts:
“(T)he very institution of marriage and conjugal love are ordained to the
procreation and education of children . . .”
In the Third Universalism, numerous
Caodai holy messages advise parents to educate their offspring.
1. Since
the first weeks of pregnancy, a mother should start prenatal education (tāijiào 胎教 – foetus
teaching). Spirit Trần Hưng Đạo’s
holy message explains prenatal education
as follows:
“With a view to having a good human race in
the future, and having model families of the society, it is required to start
establishment, that is, establishing a child while it is still in its mother’s
womb. The mother should be constantly light-hearted and clear-sighted,
dignified when walking, standing, sitting, or lying down. She should neither
listen to bad things nor chatter worthlessly, nor have unhealthy thoughts, nor
watch immoral scenes. Every moment she should think about the child to be born,
the child bestowed by the Almighty. She shall wholeheartedly cultivate herself
during pregnancy.” ([11])
Following
prenatal education is a years-long journey of laboriously nourishing and
educating a child. Spirit Trần Hưng Đạo’s holy message says:
“After a child has been born,
while he or she is growing up, the parents must make use of every skill and
long-time effort to support their child, whom they expect to win an honourable
position and a great achievement.” ([12])
As Caodaists, who
trust in God and who have a good sense of doing good deeds as well as
cultivating themselves, parents must pay much more attention to educating their
offspring so as to avoid the irony that a good tree produces bad fruit. Spirit
Như Ý Đạo Thoàn Chơn Nhơn’s holy message recommends parents as follows:
“Possessing a basis of religious mind, parents should unceasingly
move forward to guide offspring to follow the right path. Could we just
let a delicious fruit be eaten and then its seed thrown away?” ([13])
The above-quoted phrase “to follow the right path” reminds us of
the advice recorded in the Old Testament, which belongs to the First
Universalism:
“Start
children off on the way they should go,
and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” (Proverbs
22:6)
And “to
follow the right path” means to comply with the norms of a virtuous life
established by the family tradition and the religion adhered to by the family. Spirit
Cao Triều Trực’s holy message says:
Teach
children to step
on
the right path decisively
And
advise them to think of good deeds.([14])
3. With
a view to educating their own children, parents themselves have to be a good
example nearby, lively, and frequent before their offspring’s eyes, in their
everyday thoughts and activities. Since old ages, this method has been named shēnjiào 身教 – teaching
by example (i.e., teaching others by one’s own example rather than
theoretical and wordy speech). Indeed, a smoking father certainly cannot advise
his teenaged son against trying cigarettes. In the same way, if a mother is
unfilial to her parents-in-law as well as her own parents, she definitely
cannot ask her childdren to show respect and filial duty to their parents.
In the First
Universalism, instead of advising parents to set an example to their offspring,
the Old Testament recommends parents to lead such a life that their children
should always feel proud of them:
“(P)arents are the pride of their children” (Proverbs
17:6)
In the Third
Universalism, Spirit Mother Buddha’s holy message advises female Caodai
followers as follows:
“You should focus on the duty of exemplary mothers or sisters, and build
up the norms of virtue in every family. You should set up an example for your
children so that they will not lose their right way later.” ([15])
Fundamentally, what should exemplary parents be like? Drawing a
beautiful sketch of a virtuous family, Spirit Trần Hưng Đạo’s holy message
describes:
“Parents are paragons for their children.
Elder siblings are a pattern for younger ones. The husband is righteous and his
wife is agreeable. The inferior respects the superior, and the superior
thoughtfully cares for the inferior. The whole household lead a beautiful life,
free from any trouble. The family is in harmony and comfort. Inside and outside
the house is clean and orderly. If poor, still live uprightly; if wealthy, be
free from filthiness.” ([16])
Oriented
education in the Caodai family
In Caodai families children are educated
in a specific orientation which is of three levels as follows:
1. Basically, family
is the starting point of the children's education journey to lead their lives
in conformity with the principles of the
Way of Man 人道 (Réndào). Spirit Như Ý Đạo Thoàn Chơn
Nhơn’s holy message asserts:
“The Way of Man starts from the family.” ([17])
Before anything else, the oriented family
education aims at teaching children to do good deeds, to live honestly, and to
be good citizens. Borrowing the words by Matthew
(13:17), we can say that the family education is purposed to help children
become righteous people. Spirit
Lê Văn Duyệt’s holy message maintains:
“In a religious family, parents train their
children to become virtuous, which is a happiness.” ([18])
Spirit Vạn Hạnh Zen Master’s holy message
says:
“Each
family is a unit of the society; thus, religious parents should establish the
virtuous norms for their children’s lives. The children will lead a noble and
lovely lifestyle. This spiritual aspect will influence nearby families. If
there are more and much more families like those, their influence will spread
far and wide.” ([19])
2. At a
higher level, children should be guided to follow the good example of their
parents by practising self-cultivation and participating in religious affairs.
The holy message by Spirit Đông Phương Chưởng Quản advises parents:
“Due to predestined causes, they were born to
be your children. You love them, look after their needs, care for their growth,
let them have adequate food and clothing, and afford their schooling to develop
their minds. With such deeds, however, you have only done half of your duty
because they are just cared for physically and rationally while their
spirituality, consciences, and souls are still hungry and thirsty.” ([20])
The warning that their “souls are still hungry and thirsty” reminds
us of what Jesus said in the Second Universalism:([21])
“What
good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?” (Mark
8:36)
Let’s return to Spirit Đông Phương Chưởng
Quản’s holy message:
“A
father wishing to fulfil his parental mission must provide conditions to help
his children understand Caodai teaching as he does. When they understand
Caodaism and participate in its affairs, there are two benefits concerning
concealed virtuousness ([22]) and
spirit.
Concerning
hidden virtuous deeds, when parents together with children cultivate
themselves, do merits and virtues, create unseen goodness, all of them are
pushing up the fast progress of spiritual evolution till the day they attain to
Dao.
Materially,
for example, while parents are doing their utmost day and night to accumulate a
fortune, their children are, contrarily, squandering money on debauchery; thus, when will the family make a
substantial fortune?
Unseen
goodness is similar to that. Once children are aware of Dao, cultivate
themselves and do the Dao, they will make their parents feel in high spirits,
and the family becomes more pleasant and comfortable.
While
parents work hard, live thriftily, and consciously seek every small chance to
accumulate merits and virtues, children on the contrary excessively indulge in
debauchery and cause lots of trouble for their parents. Living in a bad mood,
how can parents practise self-cultivation at ease?
My dear brothers and sisters!
Those aware of doing self-cultivation are intentionally bringing happiness to
their family members and relatives as well.” ([23])
Spirit Thiện Hạnh Đồng Tử’s holy message
says:
“Thanks
to interlaced predestined relationships, in the present kalpas they are born to
a family where parents or siblings are aware of Dao and cultivate themselves,
or they promptly have convenient circumstances to enjoy a chance to facilitate
their opening holy mind, developing holy virtue, practising the Way of Saints
and then the Way of Immortals, the Way of Buddhas gradually. Saying so to
occasionally remind you that you should attentively support and guide your
descendants so as not to delay their evolution or waste their opportunities to
have human lives.” ([24])
Absorbing these above-quoted holy
messages, Caodai followers perceive that every
Caodai family is a place to learn and
practise the Dao, or a religious school. The path of self-cultivation for
liberation starts right in each follower’s family.
Actually, in principle, each Caodai family is a place to learn and
practise the Dao. A Caodai follower’s family is a place for
self-cultivation as well as doing the Dao every day and throughout his or her
lifetime. (Similarly, according to Catholicism, each Christian family is a Church at home.) Consequently, holy
messages advise Caodai followers that they are not required to carry out
self-cultivation by leaving their families and joining a religious temple. In
other words, they can cultivate themselves, learn and practise the Dao, live
with Dao right in their own families.
Spirit Cao
Triều Phát’s holy message asserts:
“Who
can live without food, clothing and shelter? Who doesn’t have a family to maintain his bloodline in his
descendants? However, let your food, clothing, housing, and family comply with
the norms of goodness, virtuousness, nobleness, and cleaness. Then, a secular
man is also a man of Dao; a worldly life is parallel with a life of Dao, and
they should not be separated into two opposing ways or directions.”([25])
When bestowing
holy messages at evoking séances, divinities in the Third Universalism often
address the attendants as “chư nhu” or “chư
sĩ”.
Caodaism names
our present world “the Long Hoa
examination field”. Long Hoa 龍華 (Lónghuā) means Dragons
and Flowers. Dragons implies males; Flowers, females. Those who pass this
general examination will be qualified to live in a coming golden era named
“nguơn thánh đức” (聖德紀元 shèngdé jì yuán, the era of holy virtue). Those who fail will inevitably be
eliminated.
The name “Long Hoa examination field” reminds us
of “the common judgement” to distinguish sheep from goats, as recorded in the
Gospel of Matthew (25:31-46). Sheep are successful candidates and goats, the
failed.
When the whole
world is “the Long Hoa examination
arena”, every human on this planet is naturally a candidate, no matter
whether he knows it or not. By this meaning, all members of a family are also
candidates for the same Long Hoa examination; thus, the greatest happiness is
that the whole household can pass this examination.
The Spiritual
Pope Lý Thái Bạch’s holy message advises:
Do
try hard to fulfil your duties
Of leading your
offspring
on the same faith
journey
Thus, how happy your
family is
When parents and
children
attend the same
examination ([26])
The Spiritual
Pope Lý Thái Bạch’s holy message confirms again that Caodai teaching regards
each family as a place to train parents and children, who are candidates for the Dragon-Flower
examination.
3. At
the highest level, the oriented family education aims at building each Caodai
family as a strong mainstay of the Holy
Assembly.
Family is where Caodaists drill their
skills to participate in the Holy Assembly’s affairs. In the Second Universalism,
likewise, sending his First Letter to Timothy, Paul the Apostle wrote:
“If
anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of
God’s church?” (1Timothy
3:5)
In the Third Universalism, Caodai Holy
Assemblies are limited in several aspects. They have not yet established
seminaries that regularly and professionally train dignitaries and officials at
various levels. They lack abundant financial resources to adequately support
dignitaries and officials who devote their lives to their Holy Assemblies. When
being healthy to perform religious missions, most of them still have to depend
upon support from their families. When becoming decrepit, they mostly spend
retirement at home with their families, where they are cared for.
Consequently, family
education aims at helping children understand the religion of their family and
appreciate the values of their parents’ religious contributions. Then, the more
they love and respect their parents, the more they wholeheartedly support their
religious devotion.
The children should also perceive that
their success and fortunate cases in life result from their parents’ merits
accumulated throughout a long journey of self-cultivation and serving their
religion. Spirit An Hòa Thánh Nữ’s
holy message maintains:
“Parents’ self-cultivation
and merits (…) favourably affect offspring in the family . . .” ([27])
Each Caodai family is a strong mainstay of the Holy Assembly
because it provides manpower for holy houses or the Holy Assembly.
Spirit Vạn
Hạnh Zen Master’s holy message advises parents as follows:
“Before wishing to spread religious teachings
to other people everywhere, do not neglect the souls surrounding and close to
you. They are your spouse and children, your siblings and relatives as well as
your friends. Having chosen a path of divine principles to entrust your life,
you must remember to train a next generation so that your noble career will
have successors. The dharma current is non-stop while your life is limited. If
wishing to have a class of successors to your noble career, no one easier to
train than your children who are young sprouts or good seeds having received
parents’ moral thoughts and benevolent favours right since the days in their
mother’s womb.” ([28])
Spirit Nguyễn
Trung Hậu’s holy message says:
“As for the personnel of a holy house, according to the
principle that old bamboo trees produce young shoots,([29]) when old-aged
Caodaist parents have passed away, their religious career should be taken over
by their offspring. Concerning administration, the Managing Board is the soul
of a holy house. If one generation departs this life, it will be replaced by
the next one. Consequently, it is required to educate and train young kids to
have those who will preserve and develop the religious career of their
predecessors. How could it be that parents or the Managing
Board are decrepit or dead, outsiders unaware of Caodaism are borrowed to run
the holy house?” ([30])
Two prerequisites
for carrying out the oriented family
education
1. To carry out oriented family education,
husband and wife must be of the same mind. If not, the family education cannot
be oriented.
Thus, they should have
the same orientation for educating their children, and share the same faith. It
is necessary to grasp this point to maintain that the Caodai New Law is not at all inconsistent with
the Caodai policy of religious harmony although the Sixth Article of Secular Law stipulates:
“Marriage is a very
important event in life. A spouse should be chosen among co-religionists;
marriage with a person of another religion is impossible unless the
spouse-to-be agrees to follow Caodaism.” ([31])
When helping their son
or daughter get married, parents should wisely choose a right matrimonial
alliance with another family. A Vietnamese proverb says, “Lấy vợ xem tông, lấy chồng xem giống.” Literally, it means, “Choose a wife by her ancestry, and choose a
husband by his breed.” Figuratively, it advises parents to consider if
their matrimonial alliance partner is virtuous or not.
So many people
mistakenly set the norms for their well-matched matrimonial alliance in terms
of material values. Why is such a choice mistaken? A basic conception of karma
can helpfully provide an answer to this question.
In addition to his own
karma (individual karma), each person
is simultaneously affected by the collective
karma (which is shared amongst his own family members). Apart from these
two kinds of karma, while leading a married life, every person shall partly
bear his or her spouse’s individual karma as well as the collective karma of
his or her family-in-law.
Consequently, parents
should be aware that if they choose a matrimonial alliance with a virtueless
family, whose richness is so dubious, their own offspring shall inevitably not
get free from part of their matrimonial alliance partner‘s bad karma.
Spirit Nguyễn Vĩnh
Từ’s holy message clarifies the parental responsibility for children’s marriage
as follows:
“They even choose a son-in-law richer, better,
of ranking higher than theirs to send their daughter to jail forever. They do
not think that their daughter while living with that man will loose her path of
self-cultivation, neglect her religion, and let her soul imprisoned in darkness
for myriads of kalpas. They are just interested in a well-matched matrimonial
alliance, in a superficial comparison. Simply thinking of choosing a man of
power, fame, and rank for their daughter, they never wisely think that if their
son-in-law adheres to the same religion and consciously cultivates himself, he
is spirituallty a dharma protector, who helps their daughter preserve her
religion and maintain her path of self-cultivation.
Alas!
Fame and rank will unavoidably decay; wealth and power will inevitably vanish.
Although only virtue exists forever, very few people take it as a norm to
choose their children-in-law, sowing the seeds of moral conduct and building up
prosperity for the future.
They
are not visionary because they have not yet realised the superiority of
virtuousness over wickedness. Their sons and daughters do not, either. Their
children only look at each other through diplomas, spruce clothing and
appearance but fail to recognise that those things are harmful to society or
worms deterring their will. Instead of reaching the bottom of human heart, they
only see the superficiality of life, and just so.” ([32])
In lieu of a conclusion
It is too early to offer a final conclusion about the virtuous
family as viewed by Caodaism. Moreover, as said before, these above pages are
only a preliminary sketch of the issue.
For more reference of this topic, a Huệ Khải’s Vietnamese-English
book entitled Gia Đình Trong Tân Luật Cao
Đài / Family in the Caodai New Law (Hà
Nội: Religion publishing house, 2014) should
be recommended reading.
We should, however,
notice the fact that not every family has two parents and one or more kids. On
this account, as Psalm (127:3) says,
do such childless couples of marriage lack “a
heritage from the Lord” or lose “a
reward from Him”? The answer is no, because when not occupied with
children, they have more conditions to make lots of useful contributions to
society and their religious community as well.
In a post-synodal
apostolic exhortation on family (entitled Familiaris
consortio, Part II, 14), Pope John Paul II clarifies the point as follows:
“It must not be forgotten
however that, even when procreation is not possible, conjugal life does not for
this reason lose its value. Physical sterility in fact can be for spouses the
occasion for other important services to the life of the human person . . .”
*
I would like to express my most sincere and respectful thanks to
both priest Peter Nguyễn Văn Hiền (Director of the Pastoral Institute of the
HCMC Archdiocese) and priest Francis Xavier Bảo Lộc (Director of Studies of the
Pastoral Institute) for their
wholeheartedness and mindfulness to launch an inter-religious course
named Discovering Catholicism and
Caodaism on 09 January 2021. This is another sign to clearly show that the
Lord’s Will, which once guided Vatican II, has just been manifested and
realised again in our beloved
As my today’s presentation is very close to the end of this
inter-religious course, I would like to convey my joyous thanks to all of my precious
friends from
May Caodai God and Jesus Christ bestow overflowing favours upon priest
Peter Nguyễn Văn Hiền and priest Francis
Xavier Bảo Lộc to help these two shepherds satisfactorily fulfil their sacred
missions.
May Caodai the Master and Jesus the Master bestow great favours upon
every instructor and attendant of this course to help us enjoy physical and
mental peace and gladness, dedicate ourselves to progress on the long journey
of self-cultivation and doing the Dao.
Namo
Caodai the Immortal
the Mahabodhisattva
Mahasattva.
Nammo Jesus the Founder, the
Saviour of the World,
and the Heaven-Honoured One.
HUỆ KHẢI
([2])
Trung Hưng Bửu Tòa – the Precious Seat for Restoration (the Caodai Missionary
Holy Assembly, Đà Nẵng city), Monday 11 Jan 1960.
([5])
According to the Caodai historical viewpoint, the First Universalism stretched
from ancient times to around the middle of the 7th century BC (circa 650 BC).
([6]) All
Bible quotations in this booklet are quoted from Holy Bible, New International Version, copyright ©2011 by Biblica,
Inc.
([9]) Familiaris consortio (Latin) means “The fellowship of the family”.
([21])
According to the Caodai historical viewpoint, the Second Universalism spread
from around the middle of the 7th century BC to around the middle of the 19th
century (from circa 650 BC to circa 1850 AD). It is noteworthy that the term Achsenzeit (Axial Age, Axial Period, or
Axis Time), coined by German philosopher Karl Jaspers (1883-1969), is to some
extent similar to the Second Universalism
as conceived by Caodaism.
([22]) Hidden good deeds (陰騭 yīnzhì) or concealed virtue (陰德 yīndé) are secret acts of virtue unknown to the
public but witnessed by divinities. In the Second Universalism, Jesus Christ
taught his disciples to do hidden good deeds as follows, “But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what
your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your
Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” (Matthew 6:3-4)
([29]) A
Chinese proverbs says: 後浪推前浪. (The
waves behind drive on those ahead, so does each new generation replace the old
one.)
